I’ve never been a big fan of travel by sea but the first trimester of my pregnancy felt like I was constantly on a rocking ship, with all the sea sickness that came along with it. In Japan, morning sickness is called ‘tsuwari’ and I found myself moaning that word aloud more often than I would have liked. As much as sickness plagued me as it does many pregnant women it also came with a certain excitement. I kind of related it to getting a new tattoo - a tattoo would hurt and itch but every time it did there would be a sense of pride and joy over being reminded of my new art, and in a way this was the same. Each time I felt sick, I would also feel a wave of excitement because at that point it was the only sign of the new life happening inside my body.
The first trimester was both a time of excitement and peace. From feeling as exhausted and sick as I did, I spent a lot of time confined to my bed and was thankful to be able to take as much time off of work as I needed. I put my radio show on hold too and just focused on growing the life inside me as well as nurturing my own mind and body. I also realized that in many ways the first trimester is really lonely and isolating.
Society tells us to keep pregnancy a secret until we’re in the second trimester at least. The reason of course is in case of miscarriage and having to break the terrible news so soon after the good. I can understand that, but at the same time after learning how common miscarriage is in pregnancy, the thought of having to cope with that alone is a horrible thought. People should be able to have support as opposed to treating a very normal occurrence as something so taboo. It’s also hard explaining why you’re always so tired and sick for weeks on end. I made the choice to disclose my pregnancy to my closest family and friends, after all, they were the ones I knew I’d want and need in my corner should I experience a loss and to get advice and encouragement from during the sickest days.
One of the major sources of excitement were my bi-weekly doctor’s appointments. I’d chosen my hospital and made my first appointment to go and confirm my pregnancy at 6 weeks. Confirming the pregnancy is especially important in Japan because it’s when you’re able to register it at City Hall and receive a swag bag of goodies. Included in the bag is the ever crucial “mother and child handbook” to document all your appointments and the even more crucial vouchers to offset the costs of everything. You can also get coupons for stores, face masks, magazines and that VIPP (very important pregnant person) badge I’ve talked about that is supposed to grant you priority seats on the train.
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| The "you're having a baby" swag bag I was more nervous than I’d ever felt on any first date heading to this appointment. It was then I learned I could have a doctor who did speak some English and it also set the scene for all my upcoming visits. It was also my first time stepping into a hospital or seeing a doctor for anything in Japan! My husband joined me and we went to the counter to sign in and find out where to go. We were able to find the the maternity ward pretty easily and once there I was instructed to use three machines to check my height, weight, BMI and blood pressure. This would become routine at all my subsequent visits along with producing a urine sample. Some paperwork was filled out, and I was instructed to wait to see the doctor for my very first ultrasound. After a brief meet and greet with a warm woman who would be my doctor, my husband was told to wait while I was escorted into an adjacent room. I was asked to disrobe from the waist down and take a seat on a chair that looked a little bit like a dentist’s chair. It turned out this chair was more rocket ship than dental however, and I quickly discovered that when it lifted up, leaned me back and forced my legs open. The other thing that caught me by surprise was the curtain separating me from my lower half and everything that went on in the other side of the room and my body. For all I knew, there could have been 100 people on the other side inspecting my bits. I exclaimed surprise at this and the doctor asked if this was usual in Canada. I told her no, everything was wide open and the patient could see the doctor. She asked if I preferred the curtain opened or closed and I asked if she could open it. She did without any hesitation and I was relieved to see it was only her and the midwife. To my left was a television where I’d have a front row seat to Fetus TV.  Unfortunately after some poking around with the ultrasound wand, I was told that while everything looked good and normal, the fetus was too small to see or detect a heartbeat and without the heartbeat, the pregnancy couldn’t yet be confirmed. She printed out a picture from the ultrasound which looked more black hole than baby and asked me to return in two weeks.  6 weeks Let me tell you, those two weeks were AGONY. It was the perfect amount of time for my anxious brain to think of every worst possible case scenario from blighted ovum to ectopic pregnancy. Thankfully I had the Tokyo Pregnancy Facebook group to help relieve my fears and convince me that this was all well and normal. Since moving to Japan, time has flown but those two weeks were the longest two weeks I had ever lived through. I tried not to let myself get too excited about being pregnant until I could hear that heartbeat and know for sure that it was real. It had to be, right? Read Part 2 HERE |
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