Socializing In A Kyoto Sento

photo: Detail from Bathhouse Women by Torii Kiyonaga, 1752-1815. Library of Congress

An older naked woman pops her head out of the door.

"Chotto matte (wait a moment)" she says, and hurries back inside.

When she returns, she's carrying two large ice cubes. She hands me one, and motions for me to put it in my mouth. Instantly, the cold startles my senses but cools down my body. She joins me in the hot spring and we are bathing side by side, silently looking up at the sky, sucking on the ice.

It isn't until I'm bathing nude at a sento in Kyoto, that I feel accepted as a foreigner in Japan for the first time.

I've chosen a plain looking sento, down a residential street called Hakusan-yu Rokujo-ten because it's close to Kyoto Station and tattoos are permitted. Most sentos, onsens, gyms or anywhere with communal bathing areas forbid people with tattoos from entering. And unless your art is small enough to cover with a bandage (or 6), you can forget about using the facility. No grey area here, even if it's clear your gaijin ass isn't remotely threatening.

Thankfully, tattoos are starting to become more accepted especially as events like the 2020 Olympics draws in tourists. In the meanwhile, my friend directs me to this sento because he has tattoos and has gone there. With a sparkle in his eyes and a wink, he tells me it's frequented by Yakuza and I don't know if he's joking or not. But at least since sentos are separated by sex, the odds of me running into any Japanese gangsters are slim. Who knows though, maybe I'll bathe with their wives.

Japan is known for their onsens and sentos and they are a deeply ingrained part of Japanese culture. The main difference between the two, is that an onsen is a hot spring and a sento is a regular bathhouse. Both have various pools (baths) with medicinal herbs, various temperatures, water pressures, etc. The other important thing to note is while pretty much everyone in Japan has a bathtub, they still go to sentos to talk, gossip, hang out and get clean at the same time. It's also a way to relax, unwind and ease the body from the day to day stresses of life.

At the entrance of the sento, I immediately remove my shoes and place them in a locker by the front door. In exchange for my shoes, I get a wooden key. I pay the woman at the front and motion that I want everything.

One of the first times I'd visited a sento, I did it all wrong. Even after I'd read all the "How to Onsen/Sento" articles I could find. I got there, and my mind went blank once I'd realized I was about to get naked with strangers. I had stepped inside and onto the tatami mats and got yelled at. I took a towel and got yelled at. I brought a beer into the bath area (I was confused by the vending machines! Turns out they are for after). I stepped into the sauna and got yelled at for that too.

It also turns out you are supposed to take your shoes off right away and put them in a locker before going into the sento, and that you have pay extra to use the big towels or the sauna. Oh yeah, and don't try to drink in the bath area like a dummy. Since this was supposed to be a relaxing experience, I wanted to make sure not to make any more mistakes.

I was given a big pink towel for the sauna, a small hand towel for the baths and directed to the women's side change room. I got naked and made my way to go bathe, feeling very self-conscious with my tattoos. The hand towel is only big enough to barely cover your privates and even though tattoos are ok here, I was the only one with any.

This sento is not very big, but had several different pools of varying temperatures including one outdoors that's taken from a hot spring.

The washing is almost as enjoyable to most Japanese people as the actual bathing. It's a social activity, complete with women sharing stories while washing each other's backs. As soon as I finish washing and prepare to soak, a group of Japanese women stop their playful chatter and huddle together. They speak in hushed tones, and sound very serious. I'm wondering if the sento really is tattoo friendly, and quickly attempt to hide my body under the water in one of the pools. This pool is warm, and there are jets that stab my muscles in the best ways.

The huddle breaks, and the oldest looking woman who later gives me the ice cube comes over.

"Bad girl?" she asks me, "or nice girl?"

All the women are staring, waiting for my answer. I feel like I'm in a sitcom or some sort of Japanese reality TV show and a wacky host is about to jump out at any second. While we are all naked.

"Nice girl!" I quickly shout, a little bit too loudly and my answer echoes through the sento.

She nods and smiles at me, then smiles at the other women as if to indicate things are all good. The playful chatter returns as she goes back to her friends and I take a deep breath and try the sauna and other baths. I use one that is coloured green with herbs, a hot spa bath, a cold plunge pool and my favourite one; the outdoor bath with water from a real hot spring.

It's in the outdoor pool where I'm joined by the older woman and the ice cube. This was also the exact moment I knew I was in love with Japan.

After I finish bathing, I head back to the changing area and partake in the post beer drinking ritual with some of the ladies. My older friend has a beer also, and she is quick to "kampai" with me. We clink our cans and I feel as if I've finally experienced the most important part of the onsen and sento experience - socializing.

Even with the language barrier, tattoos, and my general foreignness, I finally feel somewhere that could be home.